Real and online multiplayer games to make new friends — and strengthen bonds
A new national poll shows 25% of Americans say they “don’t have enough friends” and 1-in-3 American adults felt a lack of companionship “some of the time” or “often”. Separate studies reveal similar findings, with an estimated 10% of Americans lacking even one close friend.
The reasons are complex, but social isolation is most impactful to older adults. Reasons range from the loss of loved ones like a spouse, lack of mobility, and hearing problems that can make phone calls difficult. A lack of “weak ties” to co-workers and colleagues — which spikes after retirement — can hasten this sense of loneliness. In our golden years, this loneliness leads to greater risks of heart disease, depression, and cognitive decline, according to the National Institutes on Aging. But isolation among all ages is a serious issue and can be life-threatening or life-shortening at any age.
And ask anyone 5-10 years out of school how they make friends and they’ll tell you that making new friends is incredibly challenging, especially as kids and family need crowd-out time to play games.
There are ways to improve and strengthen friendships, some online and some in-person. We’ve compiled a list of ideas that may be more appealing to some than others. We’re big fans of Bunco and our sister site, Mexican Train Dominoes — both of these online games are fun to play for a quick way to pass the time. But we enjoy playing these most with real-life friends in person and in small or midsize gatherings. They are social games at heart and because they’re analog, they have a unique sense of escape to them that, when played well with other players, makes for great fun and lasting friendships. Playing games can also be a great way to combat social isolation and meet new people.
In-person games for strong friendships
Cooperative tabletop games
Cooperative gameplay is a low-stakes way to work with other players and encourage conversation. These games
- Catan is a game of resource management that requires trading and negotiating with other gamers
- Carcassonne is a tile-based game where you build a medieval landscape. It’s relatively simple and highly interactive.
- Pandemic, a cooperative game where players fight a deadly pandemic spreading around the world
- Bunco, a dice game you can play online here anytime
- Mexican Train Dominoes, a domino game you can also try online to get a sense for
Competitive card games
Rummikub, a tile-based game similar to Gin Rummy, Uno, Bridge, and Canasta, are all competitive but require a slight sense of cooperation.
Active games and athletics
If possible, a local YMCA or community center can host games like Bocce Ball, Cornhole, Croquet, and even bowling or basketball indoors in the off-weather or outdoors in the spring and summer. These games obviously require physical effort but are fun for children and adults.
Most centers have set times for active play for different age groups and is worth considering. Even middle-aged parents may find lasting friendships among other parents who take their kids to the Y for an hour or two after school.
Online games and online friends
Even the best online games and massive multiplayer games with a huge active community can be beneficial to forming friends — online. We want to be clear that new friendships are hard to make, and real friends are people you’d trust to share a meal with, pick you up if your car broke down, or turn to in a serious time of need.
An online community is just that — an online community. They are a world unto themselves and in many cases are just a simulacrum of life. As Millennials and Gen Xers age this may change, but today the social features of these games are mostly designed to keep people playing games, not form substantive relationships. However, games like Sky: Children of the Light foster connections through cooperative gameplay, in-game voice chat, and allowing players to explore worlds and develop unique in-the-moment friendships. But it is possible if you combine your existing network of friendships (even loose ties), and make the right effort to talk outside the game or in person.
Casual online games for all ages
Words with Friends 2 is a Scrabble-esque game that allows you to challenge your existing friends or new players online. There’s a simple chat function that encourages brief social interaction.
Bridge Base Online is a community for playing the card game Bridge, which always requires four players.
Chess.com is a great way to join an online chess club and participate in forums and chats.
Tabletopia is a way to play online board games. They also have new tabletop games and useful to host an online game night. The routine and experience of creating a team makes these and others a great online game.
More advanced or experienced players may enjoy World of Warcraft, Final Fantasy, Second Life, Stardew Valley, and Animal Crossing. These games offer thrilling adventures that can foster friendships.
Stardew Valley is a favorite on Nintendo and is a social simulation game where real people build a virtual island community, complete with sharing resources, season events, and more. It’s not a competitive game, either, and can be a great game to play with existing friends at the same time (like over a phone or Facetime call) or asynchronously, when people can spend time playing on their own time but receive gifts and other in-game rewards on their own time.
MMORPGs for large-scale online games
Massively Multiplayer Online Role-Playing Games (MMORPGs) are a unique breed of multiplayer games that offer large-scale social interactions. Games like Final Fantasy XIV, World of Warcraft, and Guild Wars 2 push thousands of players to interact in real-time, creating vast online communities. These games are addictive and have long-standing social interaction where players form guilds, participate in group efforts, and engage in social events.